I recently attended a sexuality workshop, "Crip Sex Ed," hosted by the local sexual health clinic. This workshop is part of the most recent iteration of a series of workshops that began in 2028 in response to a lack of disability-centric sexual education, research, and discussion. The second workshop in the series, "Crip Sex Ed" is a take on historical public school sex ed classes, which were overwhelmingly heteronormative, ableist, and "abstinence based," meaning they encouraged attendees to avoid sexual interaction and refused to provide information necessary for safe and fulfilling intimacy/sex. The workshop began with a discussion of dating and relationships. Facilitators explained the general steps of relationship initiation, strategies for efficient and accurate communication with partners or potential partners, strategies for rejecting advances and accepting rejection, and ways to discern abusive behavior. Questions and discussion were encouraged, and I found that a lot of participants added useful information to the main curriculum. It was especially helpful that we were able to discuss our personal experiences, as it allowed participants to receive advice and feedback for specific questions and difficulties that weren't directly addressed by the curriculum.
The next section addressed the more practical aspects of sexual health. We discussed contraceptive options, and the facilitators were sure to explain which methods could prevent STDs and which could not. Participants practiced applying different kinds of condoms with anatomically accurate genital models, and were encouraged to ask questions and share experiences about different types of contraception. The facilitators went over the process of getting tested for STDs, the prevalence of certain STDs, and strategies for communicating about curable and chronic STDs. For example, the facilitators explained the differences between different herpes viruses (cold sores and genital herpes are often the same virus!) and explained that at least 80% of the population carries herpes, often unawares. We then went over how, how often, and why to wash one's genitals, again with the opportunity to practice on models.
The last structured section of the workshop was a guided discussion about pleasure. Facilitators explained that sex can and should be pleasurable, and emphasized the importance of communicating when things don't feel good. We were encouraged to share pleasurable experiences, from a preferred type of caress (soft and repetitive? firm and tracing?), to erogenous zones (ears? knees? waist?), to more explicit preferences, like the use or lack of teeth during oral sex. We were then encouraged to ask any remaining questions we may have, and facilitators did their best to answer questions, guide conversation, and provide resources as needed. This was my favorite part of the workshop! It was very fun to talk about sex openly with a group of people, and I found that I got answers to questions I didn't even realize I had. The facilitators were great sports, and seemed really knowledgeable. They didn't balk at anyone's questions, and it felt so much easier to talk to someone who is an authority on sex and isn't a teacher or parent (although they did encourage talking openly with your guardians about sex!). The last part of the workshop was a collage activity. We we supplied with boxes and boxes of magazines, ranging from fashion to lifestyle to erotic, and were asked to make a collage that we felt represented "pleasure, eroticism, intimacy, and care." Those of us who wanted to had an opportunity to share our finished collages and discuss different elements. The facilitators closed the workshop by handing out little sexual care packages that included contraceptives, a sheet of sexual health resources, a zine about disabled pleasure and intimacy, and a few toys to try out! I thoroughly enjoyed my experience at this workshop. There was a real community vibe, and the facilitators were amazing at ensuring the conversation was fun, comfortable, and accessible to everyone involved. I plan on attending the other two workshops in the series, "Crip/ped and Queer/ed" and "Crip Sex for Caretakers," at the first opportunity! Whether you're just starting to explore your sexuality or are an erotic pro, this workshop has something for you.
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